Overcoming and Blessed with Virginia Jones: Resilience in Life and Leadership Episode 038

Stephanie talks to Virginia Jones about her overcoming childhood trauma and turning the dial for the better for her own family.

Virginia and her husband raised and homeschooled their two daughters while working in the ministry. While homeschooling their daughters, they realized that it was the best decision they could have ever made. They realized that the world was a different place than what they grew up in. Virginia and her husband educated their daughters to think clearly and to stand up for what they believe in.

When her days of homeschooling were over she found that her time was her own. She tried several things but finally came to discover podcasting. She  fell in love from the start. Virginia loves to meet new people, discuss people and events in history, talk about her little homestead and most definitely the Lord Jesus Christ.

When she is not podcasting, she enjoys time with her hobby and business of photography, her homestead and spending time with her family.

https://www.thevintagecafepodcast.com/

Everyone has resilience, but what does that mean and how to we use it in life and leadership? Join Stephanie Olson, expert in resiliency and trauma, every week as she talks to other experts living lives of resilience. Stephanie also shares her own stories of addictions, disordered eating, domestic and sexual violence, abandonment, and trauma; and shares the everyday struggles and joys of everyday life. As a wife, mom, and CEO she gives commentaries, and, sometimes a few rants, to shed light on what makes a person resilient. So, if you have experienced adversity in life in any way, and you want to learn how to better lead your family, your workplace, and, well, your life, this podcast is for you!

https://stephanieolson.com

INSPIRE your team to LEAD WITH SUCCESS and MOTIVATE others with Stephanie bringing 20+ years of speaking experience. If you need to EMPOWER, ENGAGE, and EDUCATE your people-Book Stephanie as your speaker today!

https://www.stephanieolson.com/ask-stephanie-to-speak

Everyone has resilience, but what does that mean, and how do we use it in life and leadership? Join Stephanie Olson, an expert in resiliency and trauma, every week as she talks to other experts living lives of resilience. Stephanie also shares her own stories of addictions, disordered eating, domestic and sexual violence, abandonment, and trauma, and shares the everyday struggles and joys of everyday life. As a wife, mom, and CEO she gives commentaries and, sometimes, a few rants to shed light on what makes a person resilient. So, if you have experienced adversity in life in any way and want to learn how to better lead your family, your workplace, and, well, your life, this podcast is for you!

https://stephanieolson.com

Transcript

Stephanie Olson: 0:03

Welcome to resilience in life and leadership with your host Stephanie Olson, speaker, author addictions sexual violence and resiliency expert. Hello and welcome to resilience in life and leadership. And I am here to introduce to you, Virginia Jones, Virginia and her husband raised and homeschooled their two daughters while working in the ministry. While homeschooling they realized it was the best decision they could have ever made. When Virginia's days of homeschooling were over, she found that her time was her own. And she tried several things, and came to discover podcasting. She loved it from the start loves to meet new people discuss people and events in history and talk about her little homestead. And most definitely the Lord Jesus Christ, when she's not podcasting, she's enjoying her hobby, and hopefully business of photography, her homestead and spending time with her family. The world is full of amazing people and many opportunity to to learn something new. She believes everyone is made unique and beautiful. And each day brings an opportunity to lighten someone's load, bring a smile to a weary face and inspire those around her. Welcome, Virginia. Hello, and welcome to resilience in life and leadership. And I am here with Virginia Jones. So excited to be talking to Virginia again, because I was a guest on her podcast of vintage lady and we'll talk about that a little bit more. And she is a busy woman with two podcasts and a lot going on. So welcome, Virginia. Thanks for being here.

Virginia Jones: 1:44

Thank you so much for having me. And yes, I did have you on my podcast. And it was such a pleasure having you on my show.

Stephanie Olson: 1:51

It was great. It was great. I just I love podcasting from a fellow podcaster to a fellow podcaster you meet so many amazing people that you would just never meet ever,

Virginia Jones: 2:04

right? Oh, yeah. I've met a lot of men of I have met a lot of amazing people. Yeah,

Stephanie Olson: 2:11

it is fun. So when we were talking, we were talking about a little bit about my story and all of the things you said, I have a story as well. And so that's what we're gonna talk about. So why don't you just start sharing your story wherever you want to begin.

Virginia Jones: 2:32

Okay, wow. Goodness, well, I would say it was from a really young age. So my parents, we used to live, we lived. Oh, goodness in several states. My dad was in the Navy. So we moved around quite a bit. Yeah. And my earliest goodness, wow. I don't know. I mean, I would say probably eight or nine years old. And in telling my story. I by no means mean to dishonor my parents in any way. So I just want to let everybody know that. But I would say and I was thinking about this the other day, you know how I would do this. But I would say, you know, probably eight or nine years old is when I started to pray that I would never be like my mom. And I started to understand. She wasn't a person I wanted to pattern my life after slowly. She was actually raised in an orphanage, and her mom was unable to take care of her. She had several siblings. So being a single mom, my grandmother, it was hard for her to raise. And I believe there were seven children. Wow. So it was really tough for her to raise all of them and join us my mom was born in trying to remember saying because like 49 I think your shoe was born. Yeah. So you know, it was really tough and they were dirt poor. You know, so they didn't have a whole lot. So, being who my mom was. Now looking back, I can say, you know, with some empathy, you know, maybe the way she was was because of all that she had gone through. Absolutely. So she was raised in an orphanage. When she was 16 years old. She ended up getting double pneumonia, and they did not recognize it or take care of it. And she ended up with severe asthma. So she had extreme asthma her whole entire life. And then when I was around, I'm going to say a lot I've been maybe 10 or 11 years old. My parents ended up divorcing my dad was gone. Most of the time, he was home on leave, you know, six months, gone six months. Yeah, that would be hard. She herself was a single mom raising two kids. So with her asthma, and then raising two children not having a husband at home, I think she allowed bitterness in her life. There were days when she was okay. And there were days when she got pretty angry and you know, stuff. And I was trying to recollect some memories. And, you know, your mind is such an amazing thing, and it actually protects you. And I think that's the mercies of God. But one definite clear memory in my mind, and I don't know how old I was maybe? I don't know, I might have been nine or 10 years old, maybe 11. I'm not exactly sure. Because it's almost like this memory. And then my dad leaving was really close together. Sure. So I just remember them getting into an argument. And I remember it being over the amount that was in the checkbook, it was over money. And I remember my dad just, you know, throwing the kitchen table and placement guy everywhere. And they were screaming and hollering and. And, you know, shortly before that, because my mom. Unfortunately, she took her anger out on our kids. And I remember, and I'm not trying to be too graphic, but I remember being stretched and I was beaten with about oh,

Stephanie Olson: 6:55

I'm sorry. And sorry. That's hard.

Virginia Jones: 7:04

And my dad walked down on it. And he stopped it. You know, I mean, she probably would have killed me, how do you not stopped, you know, the situation. But when he left, he left knowing that we were going to be left in her hands. Years later, I was able to go out and visit my dad in Idaho when he left. He lived in a town not too far away from us for you know, several years. But then he ended up moving to Idaho. So he was you know, 3000 miles away. Right. And it's really hard to build a relationship with a parent when they're that far away. It is absolutely possible. Right. So when he left, he left knowing that my mom was the way she was. And when I was able to visit him. I confronted him with it. And I do really? Yeah. And but it was hard. And I told him, you know, you you deserted me, you left me in the hands of a woman who was an angry person. Right. Um, so after the divorce, we ended up moving to Florida. And that was because my mom's family was down there. Now. Did

Stephanie Olson: 8:25

you have siblings? Do I? Yeah.

Virginia Jones: 8:28

I have one brother. Okay, okay. Yeah. And he actually lives about a half an hour away. Got it. And I'll get into that in a minute. So we went to Florida, and it was because she had family down there. And she was hoping versus, you know, some sort from them, right. Unfortunately, that didn't happen. And then the doctors told her that mean would be a good thing for her because of her health and everything. Oh, okay. Right. So we ended up moving back to Maine. When we came back to Maine, we lived right across the street from a Baptist church. I actually maybe that was before I apologize. I'm so sorry.

Stephanie Olson: 9:17

No, well, I think that's an important point that I just want to make because when people experience trauma, their memories of that time are not linear. And so that's really important to understand. And trauma memories are just kind of jumbled all over the place. So it makes total sense. Yeah,

Virginia Jones: 9:38

right. Actually, that was before we left. We left and the funny thing is you know it's not funny haha. But you know, there was abuse. I mean, I was talked down to I was told I was nothing, you know, I would never amount to anything and The Baptist preacher, who we went to church with this, this person, and he was also a teacher in the local school. And one day I actually broke down in his classroom and cried, I just, I just broke down. He never once came to our home that I remember really never and I don't ever remember him coming and talking to my parents or anything like that. I I can't remember him ever coming. So we ended up moving to Florida coming back to Maine. Wow. We did move back to the town that we were and before and we lived in a just a different section of the town and everything. And then later, we ended up moving to Gardner it was there in Gardner that I got witness to by a friend, who unfortunately, she's not living for the Lord right now. But she went us to me and invited me to church and I went and the Lord saved me and but before that, before I came to the Lord, I tried to commit suicide twice, because I just felt like I was nothing. You know, I wasn't important, you know, anything like that. After I came to the Lord, my mom and my brother also came to the Lord, my brother has back slid, he's not living for the Lord. And I thought, you know, my mom is Scott, the Holy Ghost, she, she's been baptized, she's saved, things are going to be different, right? Unfortunately, that didn't happen. I no longer received physical abuse. But I still received a mental, you know, I was constantly told I would never amount to anything that I was no good. Nobody wanted me, you know. So skip to several years later. I ended up finding my husband. I apologize. I'm no cry,

Stephanie Olson: 12:08

please.

Virginia Jones: 12:10

I ended up we actually met at, we actually the first time we actually met was at a roller skating rink, and it was a youth function. Oh, wow. And we were skating. And before we get off the skating rink floor, my husband squeezed my hand. I just knew I knew right, then I'm like,

Stephanie Olson: 12:31

How old were you?

Virginia Jones: 12:33

I'm 16.

Stephanie Olson: 12:36

Wow, wow. That's like every 16 year old girls dream in the 80s? For sure. Right? Oh, right. That's great.

Virginia Jones: 12:45

And so later, I saw him at a senior camp, and I'm like, Oh, my word. He goes to my church. I didn't really associate it with that, you know. So one night, I was walking across the front of the church, and my husband and his friend were on the drum set over across the church. And as I was walking across the church, the Lord said, that's your husband. And, wow, just as clear as day. And, you know, one thing I want to point out here is, you know, a lot of people say that you marry someone that's like your dad. Right? And, you know, a lot of people and I have found that to be true in a couple of my friends lives, they marry exactly like their parents. Sure. I refuse to do that. I said, I will not marry somebody like that. And, you know, I don't want to be my mom. I and I made that. Like I said, from a very young age, I never want to be like her. I just don't and you know, every girl wants should want to be like their mom. Right? Right. You know, and it should be but I was determined. I'm like, No way. You know, I'm not being like this, you know. And so, you know, the Lord told me, that's your husband. So, you know, a couple of years later, we ended up getting married. And in the midst of all this craziness, you know, even though I came to the Lord, I would not call God Father. I refused. I'm like, Are we my father? My dad abandoned me. And it was several years later, you know, quite a few years later, I don't even know how many that I finally came to acknowledge the Lord is my father. And I actually had a guest on my show. That wrote a book Hey, Dad, it's me. And she was describing how, you know, even though she didn't understand God, as her father, he was her father, though the whole entire process of her situation. And looking back on that now, I know God was with me. I know he was And, you know, he, he has a purpose for me, you know, I'm here now I'm telling my story, somebody else here is going to hear this, who's going to see this, you know, and say, hey, you know, I can relate to this, you know, right. So, when I married my husband, it took years for him to reprogram my mind. And, you know, a lot of times my husband and I will, will tell people, you know, because some people say it for Christians, you know, you're brainwashed, you know, like, Yes, praise God, I am. I've been washed by the blood of Christ, you know, and but it took years for my husband to actually help me to see that, you know what, I'm, I'm somebody, right? I'm a daughter of the King of kings and the Lord of Lords. He is amazing. Yes. And he chose me, you know, and what a what an awesome God, we have, you know, to guess, to know that, through all my craziness, and through all the stuff that I went through, and I wasn't a perfect kid, either, you know? Well, yeah. You know, I turned Jesus right in your rents, and I turned to things, right. But God still loved me. He still chose me, you know. So, several years later, we ended up having our first daughter. And then six years later, we had our second one. Oh, wow. And, you know, looking back, and I say, this was shame in a way, because, you know, you say, you don't want to be like your parents, and I didn't want to be like my mom. But there were some things that and I ended up being like her, you know, and when I saw that, it shocked me. I was like, I, God, forgive me, you know, I don't want to do this. You know, I don't want to be like that. And I've really gone through a struggle recently with that, because my husband and I, we've struggled with gut issues for over 20 years.

Stephanie Olson: 17:13

Yeah, yeah.

Virginia Jones: 17:15

And it's been a lonely road. Because, you know, we don't have a lot of friends. We don't have any really.

Stephanie Olson: 17:22

And you live, you live in a pretty isolated area, don't you? Yeah,

Virginia Jones: 17:27

it's not really that though. It's we take some stands in the Word of God, that not a don't necessarily go with people's narrative. And so we don't really have a lot of fellowship. And then, you know, with my husband's illness, you know, I wasn't getting any companionship from him, either. So, you know, I've had a really struggle with this. But I was thinking today, and I've been grumbling, and I've been complaining, and, but on my podcast, I like to end it with gratitude makes what we have more than enough. Yeah. And today, as I was going outside, and it was sunny out, and it's cold, you know, it's sunny, and I'm like, God, I do not want to be a better person, because my mom was better. You know, she was jealous of me. And every time I would have an accomplishment, she would want to be like that. Or I'll give you an example. Like, when I got my camera for my photography, business, and my mom's like, well, you know, instead of praising me, for I'm so glad that you're getting this and it's getting off the ground and blah, blah, blah, whatever. She's like, well, how come you can't buy me one? Oh, it's like, so it was always stuff like that, you know, it's turning back to her. Yeah. And it was constantly self all the time. And so as I'm going out today, I'm like, God, I don't want to be bitter. I don't want bitterness will destroy you. Kills. Yeah. And it aged her is separated her from her kids and her grandchildren. And going to my brother, I do have one sibling. He lives probably 25 minutes away throughout the divorce, so and because of all the divorce it has cause like a chasm, and it does divorce tears families apart. Yeah. And it destroys families and it not just destroys the parents and the children, but it destroys the grandchildren, my daughters don't know, their grandpa. And then on top of that, I struggled with a little bit of betterness with my dad remarrying. He ended up marrying and she had three children Hmm, well now he's raising a whole new thing. Exactly. And I'm struggling with jealousy. I'm struggling with anger and bitterness. It's like Where were you when I needed you? And now you're raising these three, and I don't even really know them. I mean, I visited with them a couple of times. I've never seen my, my oldest stepbrother. I've never seen him, I probably will never see him. In also, all these things, you know, people think divorce, oh, it's kids will ever affect me. But people don't realize how much it does affect it does. And, you know, with mental abuse. You know, words hurt. And they they cut so deep? Yes. Very powerful. Yeah. And you never heal. Really, I mean, even coming to the Lord, I still struggle with days when I tell myself, I'm not good enough. And then I'll I'll stop and like, you don't have to be you because God is yeah, you know, I'm never going to be good enough. But God is,

Stephanie Olson: 21:09

you know, right. Right. So, wow. You know, it's so there's so much to unpack in your story, because and first of all, I am so sorry, that that happened to you. I think that people really need to, because there's a lot of there definitely a lot of similarities that I can really hear in your story to mine. And I think the biggest one is that abandonment piece, that when there is abandonment, it is so massive, and they say that one of the biggest traumatic events in a child's life is the abandonment of a parent. And so when you look at that, and then you add that layer on top of it, your dad abandoned you knowing that he was leaving you with an abusive parent. Right. Right. And that is so I mean, so that just compounds that trauma. And I think that those are things that we just really need to recognize. And I was I was just talking about trauma today and talking about really embracing the healing of our trauma, because first we have to recognize it. And then we have to forgive ourselves for because you set it you feel shame, you feel all but but none of that was your fault. Right at all. But for some reason we feel, gosh, this is now I am doing what was done to me or whatever it may be so Wow.

Virginia Jones: 23:01

Yeah. And one one memory that just came to my mind. And, you know, I've I've asked myself, you know, many times, what did I do to, to deserve that or whatever. When my mom was on her deathbed, and I've don't think I've ever told anybody this actually. When she was on her deathbed, I held her hand for a few minutes. And there was there was favoritism between my brother and I, my mom showed a lot of favoritism to my brother. And that's, you know, I don't hold that against him. You know, that's the way my mom was. But as she was dying, I held on to her hand for a few minutes, and she pulled her hand away from me. And, you know, some people can say, well, that's just the body reacting or, you know, but I knew, you know, that even in death, you know, my mom rejected me. Wow. And, you know, that really hurt. And then, you know, I went through a whole fiasco after she passed away, but I really, you know, that's something in the past and I really, I've come to a culture with that. But you know, parents really need to be careful, you know, how they parent their children and words can cut so deeply and showing favoritism to one child over the other that can be felt it really really can it can be, and you know it, I really feel like I have forgiven my mom. Um, I hope I have, because, you know, I want my relationship with the Lord to be right at the back So you know that it can be it doesn't mean however that, you know, if she were still alive that I would just be buddy buddies with my mom. Right. All right. And, you know, speaking of her in our passing, I was thinking again today, you know, you know, what questions Is she going to ask, you know, how am I going to say this, you know? But, you know, some people asked me if I miss my mom. And my answer to that, and I hope to some people, it doesn't sound harsh. But there's some aspects I miss about her. But in many ways, I don't. Yeah, and absolutely, it's just real life. You know, it's just the way it is. I mean, when you have an abusive parent, it's hard. It's hard to love them, you know?

Stephanie Olson: 25:56

Yeah. And sometimes, I think that it's, we have to put those boundaries in place. And sometimes that means that we're actually not even going to have a relationship. Right, it could mean separation to the point of, I need to distance myself from you. So severely. And, you know, I think that forgiveness piece is so important, because forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. And we make that choice over and over again. And I love what you're saying, because that, you know, you're not going to feel all those feelings of oh, that person is, is wonderful now, and if that person were here, I would spend every minute No, forgiveness is saying, I choose not to hold bitterness, I choose to forgive you. And that has to be almost consistent, because those feelings are going to come up again. Over and over wrong.

Virginia Jones: 27:01

Absolutely. Yeah, right. Oh, absolutely. I mean, I would say, you know, on a daily basis, you know, I'm having to choose to to walk a different way. You know, even parenting I mean, I chose to parent differently. Yeah, I made mistakes. I mean, my daughters will tell you that I chose to love my kids. I did not tear my children down. You know, when they made mistakes, you don't go and beat them over the head. Right. Right. You know, right, try to build your children up and when they hex have successes and victories, embrace that celebrate them. Yeah, no, absolutely. You know, yeah. Yeah. You know,

Stephanie Olson: 27:41

I think too, that we do we learn from our parents, whether we learn good or bad, we learn from our parents. And I think that is that parenting, oh, my gosh, hardest thing in the world. She pick on me, oh, my goodness. And it's a fabulous thing. And it's amazing. But I can't even tell you how many times I've said, Oh, I regret doing this. I wish I would have done it right away and, and you just can't go back. But that's God's grace. That's where I you know, God gives you the grace to His mercies are new every morning. And I love what you're saying about gratitude. And so I would love for you to talk a little bit because you, you touched on, you know, those, those old and I'm gonna date myself, but those old tapes playing in our mind, you know, the old, you know, you're not worthy, you're not, you know, that, that really, that is used against us by the enemy through whomever. Right? What do you do to reset your mind reset your thinking?

Virginia Jones: 29:03

Wow. You know, there's a lot of times that I'm having those thoughts in my mind. And, you know, I will kind of look into you know, this, this spiritual mirror, I guess you could say, and I'm nothing, okay. I'm nothing without God. And I know that, you know, if it wasn't for the Lord, I would be nothing and that's true. But I am something in Christ, because my identity is not in me, right? It's not in who I am, is in who the Lord is. Right? And when those and I've had them quite often lately, like with my podcasting, and trying to do all this crazy stuff, and I'll explain a little bit more about that. But in all of that, you know, I've started To beat up on myself, and then I'll look in that spiritual mirror and I'll say, no, no, you're not going there. You're a daughter of the king. Yeah, you know, you may not be able to do this. But in Christ, I can do all things. Right, right. And so to do it like to do with my podcasting, and my photography, and I, you know, I'm trying to build a photography business I'm trying to do to podcast. And, you know, I'm on different social media things. And so, this year, I made it a purpose that I was going to call some things out of my life, I've removed some people off of social media. Good thing. Yeah, they're, you know, they're not, they're not wanting me to be a part of their life. So and that's one thing I don't like about social media. And I'll talk a little bit about that, too. But I made it the purpose that, okay, I'm going to clean my plate a little bit, because I've got too much on it. And I'm going to focus on these things, because I don't want my marriage falling apart. I don't want my kids, you know, my children, one daughter still lives with us, another daughter lives about a half an hour away. And, you know, we'll go out for coffee. And, you know, we'll go over, I'll go over to my oldest daughter's house, we'll do some crafting. And you know, we're building that relationship still. Right, right. Um, you know, my husband, even in all the craziness that's going on right now, we're still together, and I have to focus on the good things I have to focus on. Okay, I still have my husband here, right? We're going to be able to get through this, and we're going to be strong for it. Alright, so I'm trying to clean my playing a little bit and decide, okay, what things do I need to prioritize on? One thing you can never take for granted is relationships, right? Don't ever do that. And if you can, build your relationships with your kids and your spouse, if you have to, like you said, if you have to, you know, sever some relationships, to help you to stay healthy, then that's what you need to do. And that's what I've had to do. And, you know, talking about social media, you know, social media, a lot of people go on there, and they can say anything, right? And I have this year said, You know what, I'm going to be real with people. And if there are people that I have on social media, who are not going to be a part of my life, who are not going to be real with me, then I'm going to remove them, I don't need them in my life, if you're not going to take the time to have me or invest in me, then. Why am I even having you on my friends list, you know, on Facebook and stuff. And we can get so bogged down in the social media thing, and we can put anything we want to on there, when in real life people are hurting. Yeah, there's so many people on social media that yeah, they can put a smiley face on their profile. But really, they're, they're falling apart. And, you know, I, I do my podcasts because I want to inspire people, I want to help people that you know what there is hope. There is hope. And, you know, I say to anybody who, you know, has gone through mental abuse, whether it be from a parent or a spouse. You know, there's even parents who are abused by their children. Oh, yeah, mentally. You know, if you have to sever that relationship, or if you have to have a separation, then do it. You know, try to get help, you know, trying to get somebody who will stand beside you. And, you know, like my husband, I mean, and you can even ask him today. I mean, we've been married for 32 years. Wow, congratulations, and even now is still, you know, don't talk like that. You know, don't you don't tell yourself that. And also, I'm still struggling with it. You know,

Stephanie Olson: 34:16

it's a it's a process. Yeah, it truly is a process. It's not a quick fix. There is, you know, I think God rarely provides that. Okay, miraculous healing right, then because one of the things that we can do when we learn through those is help others through those. Right, right. Yeah. And I was always looking for miraculous healing and every part of my life, like, Nope, sorry, I want you to teach us you know, and you're not really relatable if you can't tell that story. So I

Virginia Jones: 34:52

write well, yeah, well, like I said, I mean, like with my mom coming to the Lord and, you know, I do believe She went on to be with the Lord. I do believe she had faith. You know, there were some areas like all of us, we all have areas to grow in. Yeah. But when she came to the Lord, I, you know, I was thinking, Oh, great, you know, she's gonna be a whole different person, you know, and it just didn't happen. And then later, you know, I talked to my aunt, her sister, and, you know, she did tell me that she was a different person before she got on medication and stuff. Because we're asthma. She ended up on prednisone, which I know from a personal experience with my husband, it does change you. Yeah, yeah. It really does. And, you know, she said she was a totally different person before. So in some ways, you know, looking back, I can have some sympathy, empathy for her, you know, and, but it still doesn't change. Like, I wish I had had a mom who I could have bonded with, you know, in a deeper way, but absolutely, yeah,

Stephanie Olson: 35:58

absolutely. And so you grieve that? Yeah. And and that's a good thing. And then you have an opportunity to, I've heard say, you know, you have two opportunities. If you don't have the parents you want, then you can be the parent. Right, your kids need. And so you've obviously done that, which is great.

Virginia Jones: 36:23

I've tried God's grace. Yes. I

Stephanie Olson: 36:27

love that. So tell us about your podcasts. Okay.

Virginia Jones: 36:31

Well, I have a podcast called a vintage lady and one called the cafe mana sauna, vintage lady. I like to have people on who, you know, have inspiring stories who have really faced a lot of obstacles and you know, overcome and been, you know, achievers. And then, you know, I like to talk about people and events in history. I like to talk about our homestead we're trying to build a small homestead called Barton cottage farm. It's from the book Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen. Yeah, I'm a Jane Austen fan. So, you know, I like to talk about different stuff like that. On the cafe mana is more of, you know, a Bible based. I'm trying to get guests on there. Who are you inspiring leaders who are, you know, have a World Bible view of the world and things you know, so I'm just starting out with that one, but I've been doing a vintage lady gonna swell a year and a half now. Looks like that.

Stephanie Olson: 37:41

I love it. A vintage lady who has two podcasts, which is very modern. Yeah, true. That is great. I love it. And then your photography. Tell us about that. Okay, so

Virginia Jones: 37:56

um, I would say, Oh, my goodness. I don't know. Sometime last year I came. Oh, September of last year, I think is when I started that I think I can't remember. Anyway, it's called a girl and gray photography. So I specialize in black and white photography. Again, vintage. Old fashion. I'm just an old fashion thinker. I love the old fashioned ways, you know, and stuff. So I specialize in black and white photography. And I like to do a lot of stuff in macro photography. So I really like to get up close and personal with my subject. And I do a lot of nature landscape, stuff like that. That's me, I hope to eventually get my stuff in some galleries, maybe some magazines and stuff. So who knows where that's gonna go, but it's

Stephanie Olson: 38:47

exciting. I love it. I do too. So where can people find you Virginia?

Virginia Jones: 38:55

Okay, I'm on Facebook. I did have an Instagram account. I got rid of it. Because the Instagram is pretty much focusing on my my farm and so okay, but you can find me on Facebook. So if you go to Facebook, and you look up a vintage lady, I'm on there. So great. Yeah. And if you want to email, that's a vintage lady. 18 seventeen@gmail.com.

Stephanie Olson: 39:21

Perfect. All right, and I'll make sure to have all of those links in the podcast notes. vital question for you. Does resilience mean to you?

Virginia Jones: 39:35

Wow. I would say you know, coming back from you know, any kind of struggle coming back with with the strength in a vigor that. That means, you know, you can, you can be stronger than you were before and you can learn from what you've gone through and you know, Just like, you know, I question sometimes why I went through all that, but I went through it for a reason I went through it to be a witness and a testimony to other people. So I think, you know, coming through a situation and being stronger for it.

Stephanie Olson: 40:13

Yeah. I love that. That is beautiful. And you are, you have an amazing story and I really appreciate the work you're doing. And I really appreciate you coming on the show. It was great to talk to you from this angle. So

Virginia Jones: 40:29

thank you so much for having me you

Stephanie Olson: 40:31

and thank you for listening to resilience and life and leadership. We'll see you next time. Thank you for listening. Please share with anyone you think will benefit from this podcast.